A PanAfricanist Queer Womanist Collective

Abused By My Own

By Siya Mcuta

I go to bed everyday wondering
I cry myself to sleep as I don’t belong
Floating. Yes, floating is the word
I do not belong here and there.
Introductions are made and I mention
I am a mother, a sister, a lover and a daughter,
I see confused faces some come to me and ask,
‘Then if you are a lesbian how did you become a mother?’

As if lesbians are suppose to be infertile.
I see judgments in their faces as if I betrayed the world.
Now the question is ‘do they deserve my answer?’
Is my becoming a mother while I’m a lesbian such a sin?
Do they know my story or should I write it from their views?
Am I paying for my past right now or should I start calling my child?
My brother so that no one will ever call me a ‘traitor’ nor ‘confused ‘
What about this precious life that I brought into this world
I am denied as woman, denied as a person, denied as a lesbian
These are my own words.
This is my life, my story I have a right to write it my way
I belong, I love and I’m human too.
Your definition of me is not the right one.

4 comments on “Abused By My Own

  1. Khanyisa Kaylove Botha


  2. HOLAA!

    Thank you. The author will be happy to know that her thoughts were so well received. Thanks for visiting the blog!

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  4. Deondina

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